mab: mab cosplays (sexy wexy)
[personal profile] mab
Note: I know most of my f-list isn't familiar with the Percy Jackson fandom. But I miss sharing what I'm doing on lj, so I thought I'd just post a smutty little thing here and maybe somebody will like it. No worries if it's not your cuppa!

[livejournal.com profile] gracerene and [livejournal.com profile] nia_kantorka I know you've both already read it. Thanks for that!


Title: Uncomfortable Truths
Author/Artist: [livejournal.com profile] mab
Rating: NC-17
Pairing(s): Jason Grace/Percy Jackson
Word count: 7250
Contents: Bromance to Romance, Competition, Guilty Pleasures, Implied/Referenced Cheating, 69, Anal fingering, Rimming, Anal Sex, First Time, Size Kink
Disclaimer: All recognizable characters and settings are the property of Rick Riordan, inspired by Percy Jackson and the Olympians and The Heroes of Olympus. I am not making any money from writing this piece of fan fiction. I'm only playing in his sandbox.
Summary: Percy can't keep his mouth shut and it gets him in all sorts of trouble.
A/N: This fic happened while I was sick and supposed to be taking it easy and resting from proofreading for the HBB. Yeah, well, I have no shame. The title at the top links to the Ao3, if you'd rather read it there.
Spoiler warning: Spoilers are in here for the whole series.




"Well, that sucked," Jason says, rolling his shoulder and grimacing, his hair and clothes plastered to his body.

Understatement of the century I think to myself, but I don't say anything. I climb to my feet, the rocky sand crunching beneath my shoes. I'm not wet, despite being caught up in a typhoon, along with Jason, and thrown several miles from where we started. My half-sister, Kymopoleia was not kidding when she said being feared by demigods was more important to her than being represented in action figure form. She kept the action figure, though. I have a feeling she's sweeter on Jason than she lets on, and I'm thankful for it. Seriously, she could have killed us, but settled for scaring us shitless.


I give Jason a hand and he pulls himself upright. He's shaking from the cold and seems to have trouble regaining his balance.

"Come on, bro," I tell him, offering my arm. "I got you. We gotta find somewhere to lie low for the night."

He drapes his arm over my shoulder, leaning on me as I lead us up the rocky beach to a row of dingy-looking hotels.

"Thanks, man," he says, teeth chattering. "I owe you one."

"Dude, you owe me like ten."

"Shut up, Jackson. Just get us somewhere warm."

I chuckle and half-carry Jason's heavy ass to the nearest hotel with a vacancy sign.

~*~


I get us a room and Jason takes his key, suddenly perfectly able to carry his own weight.

"I'm gonna take a hot shower. Get us some food?"

He takes off before I have a chance to answer. I roll my eyes and turn back to the guy at the counter. "Any place nearby sell food?"

He points to a mini-mart across the highway.

I sigh, and head back out into the night. Grace really does owe me big time.

I'm lying to myself. It's so good to be back in the thick of adventure again. Finishing high school was a total bust. I know Annabeth is disappointed, but after working with half a dozen school counselors, it's pretty clear my way forward is gonna be a GED. I'm alright with that. The University in New Rome said they'd accept it without a problem. It was a fluke running into Jason when I'd gone to check it out, but when he mentioned visiting Kymopoleia to settle our score, there was no way I wasn't coming along.

~*~


I have to jiggle the key in the lock, but finally get it to work and push open the hotel room door. Jason strolls into the room along with a billow of steam, a towel wrapped around his waist.

"Dude, yeah. You're the best," he says as I push the grocery bag into his arms and make for the bathroom. I have to piss like nothing else.

"Don't forget it," I call over my shoulder. "And leave me something to eat!" I slam the bathroom door behind me, so happy to see a toilet I could cry.

There's a rumbling sound coming from the cabinet beside the sink. I finish pissing, then take a look. I open the bathroom door a crack. "Is this a washing machine?"

"Yeah! Isn't it awesome?" Jason calls back. "My stuff should be done in about twenty minutes. It's gotta hang to dry, but you can use it next. Better than what we're used to."

"Right on." I close the door and strip myself. The idea of a hot shower and clean clothes is pretty close to Elysium after the typhoon. I'm not going to complain.

~*~


I toss my clothes in the small washing machine and hang Jason's up on the shower curtain rod, then wrap a towel around my waist and return to the hotel room. Jason's stretched out on the bed and tosses the remote on the nightstand. It's the first time I've had a chance to look at our digs for the night.

"What the hell? There's only one bed?"

Jason sits up, holding his towel in place and dusting sandwich crumbs off his bare chest. "Yeah, and there's nothing good on TV either.” I flop on the bed next to him and hold out my hand for the remote. He shrugs and hands it to me and I flick through the channels. There's only six of them and most are news. I drop the remote and grab the grocery bag.

At least he left me a sandwich, an apple, and a bag of chips.

Jason snorts as I take a bite and I raise my eyebrows.

"Unless you wanna check out what's in the DVD player. Seems whoever had the room before us left a disc."

I don't trust the smirk playing on his lips, but there's also a challenge hanging in the air between us.

I reach for the remote, watching his eyes light up in anticipation, then aim it at the television set and hit the DVD button. "Seriously?" I say, but it comes out a lot more like smmerschleee with my mouth full of sandwich. I finish chewing and swallow while Jason laughs his ass off. "Seriously, dude. Gay porn?"

Two can play at whatever game Jason thinks he's winning. I shrug and settle back against my pillow, munching my sandwich and settling in as if I'm actually fine with watching it.

After about a minute Jason clears his throat. "Umm, you're not really going to watch this are you?"

I finish my sandwich and take out my apple. "Nothing else on," and then the camera moves to a close up and my stomach turns. I hit the off button on the remote, my face scrunched up.

Jason starts laughing again. "Knew it!" He takes the remote from me and puts it back on the nightstand.

"Don't even start. They were licking each others’ assholes. That's just not right."

It takes Jason a while to catch his breath. "I … I'm not sure that people really do that in real life. It's fake, right? Like for shock value?"

I take a bite of my apple and chew it. It doesn't taste right. I put it back in the bag and pull out the chips instead. "I dunno. Do you think …" I stop talking before I say something I'll regret and shove a handful of Lays into my mouth.

"Do I think what?"

Damn it, Grace. Can't you ever let a subject drop?

Apparently not. He's waiting for me to swallow my mouthful. I reach for the bottle of water on the nightstand and open it. Waste of an extra three dollars, but even the chips don't taste right at moment. I need to wash my mouth out and refuel.

After downing half the bottle, I put the cap back on. "You don't think, like, Nico and Will … nah. They wouldn't be into that, would they?"

"Nah," Jason says, and takes my water away and finishes it.

"Hey, you're gonna get my cooties."

Jason shrugs. "Figure I've already got them. I dunno. I've never really thought about Nico …" he gestures vaguely "… and sex. But I'd kill anybody who gave him a hard time about licking Will's ass if that's what he wants to do!"

I hold out my fist and Jason bumps it. "Damn straight."

Jason grins. It's his rile-me-up grin.

"What?"

"You know that's why you're not his type, right?"

I roll my eyes and then punch Jason in the arm. "That was a year ago. Drop it already."

Jason just keeps grinning. "Okay, fine. What do you want to do while we wait for our clothes?"

The atmosphere seems to have changed. I'm not sure I like it. It's more charged, like Jason's itching for some sort of challenge. I have to admit, it's been great seeing him again. I don't have the same sort of playful relationship with any of my other guy friends, and the last several months in the mortal world was bringing my mood way down.

It has to be the relief of just being around someone who gets me, I dunno, but I just want to mess with Grace's head. "Well, we could forward past the ass licking and make fun of the corny plotline in that porno."

Jason raises his eyebrows, his mouth twitching at the corner. He grabs the remote. "You really think there's a plot at all?"

I shrug as Jason hits the forward button on the remote and a new scene starts.

~*~


I don't even know how we made it through the end of that thing. Most of the time was spent cracking jokes and laughing our asses off, but a lot of times I'd make a joke to cover up the fact I was starting to get hard.

Jason turns off the TV and puts the remote back on the nightstand. "You wanna get your clothes out of the washer? We should get some shut eye."

I climb off the bed, adjusting my towel so it stays in place and take care of the laundry. It's not weird, is it, I wonder to myself, that two guy friends are hanging out in only towels, making fun of gay porn before turning in for the night, sleeping in the same bed?

I tell myself it's not weird. Demigods live different lives than mortals, and being comfortable around the people you'd die for and who would die for you isn't a big deal.

When I return to the bed, Jason's turned off the lights and I have to feel my way under the blankets. My foot bumps his and he pulls it away.

"Dude, your feet are cold."

I lie on my side, facing him, though he's facing away and deliberately put both feet on the backs of his calves.

"That's it, Jackson," he says and I prepare myself for battle.

But I don't see what's coming. He traps my legs with his, and flips himself over until he's pinned me to the bed, an arm pressing down on my chest until my lungs feel like they'll burst and the other across my throat.

I smack the arm at my throat with my only free hand. He lets up enough to let me breathe. "I surrender," I gasp.

He releases me and flops back down on the bed. "Don't forget it. If you steal the blankets, I won't be so nice."

The threat might have been scarier if he wasn't trying not to laugh while saying it.

He pats the bed, searching for something. I grab the towel he lost lying on top of me and hand it over, and we settle down side by side on our backs.

"I'm not sleepy," I complain.

He grunts, and I'm quiet for a while. I stare up at the ceiling, not really able to focus on much of anything.

"Can I ask you a personal question?" he asks after a few minutes of silence.

"Go for it," I say. I'm really not tired. I'm not sure what I am, but if we weren't sharing a bed, and a room, I'd probably be jerking off to get my brain in a sleepy mood.

"I uh … I was just wondering. It's on my mind because of that video, probably. Just … Have you, you know … gone all the way with Annabeth yet?"

My cheeks burn in the dark. We don't usually talk about our girlfriends when we hang out. I wonder if that's not normal. "What do you think, Grace?" I say, trying to sound as if I'm not fazed by the question. "We're 18 years old, going to the same school, seeing each other on all our days off …"

"So you have?" Jason asks. He's clearly looking for a straight answer.

I'm not sure why it's so hard to say it. But I finally do. "Yeah, only once, though."

"Is that why you left? Did it go badly?"

My defenses are up; I can't help it. "No," I say, trying not to grit my teeth. "Not really. It was my grades mostly. I don't really want to talk about it." That is the honest to gods truth. It makes me feel like a total loser, talking about why I dropped out of high school. Perfect Jason wouldn't be able to understand why school is so hard for me. He was raised in New Rome, where they actually get that kids with learning differences aren't morons, they just learn differently. It's a sore point between me and Annabeth. She insists that struggling through the education grind is worth it; I disagree.

"Why?" I ask him. I figure if he's going to ask me painful questions, he should be expecting some in return. "Did you and Piper have sex and have it go badly?"

It comes out sounding a lot worse than it had in my head. But, amazingly, Jason doesn't seem offended.

"Yeah, you could say that." His voice is quiet in the dark. I'm so far out of my league here, but the guy sounds like he needs to talk about this with somebody. I'm kind of honored he chose me.

"Well, tell me about it," I say. I'm not sure what else I'm supposed to say. "I've got your back. I won't tell anybody."

"We've tried a few times," Jason says, then spills his guts. "It's just, I like what we do, but … she's kind of afraid of my dick."

My eyes boggle. I'm not sure my ears are working right.

"She likes it when I go down on her, and I get her to come without any problems, but when it comes to, you know, penetration, she just can't do it. We tried once, and it was bad, so I backed off. I really am okay with just doing oral, but she has trouble with doing it back, too. I dunno. I feel like an awful boyfriend for even wanting her to do more than she can."

"Um, is there something wrong with your dick?" I ask. My mind is turning in circles. Piper is the daughter of Aphrodite, for Poseidon's sake. I'd think she'd be made for all the sexy times.

"It's big," Jason says, and leaves it at that.

"Big?" I ask. "The problem or your dick?"

I can practically hear him roll his eyes at me. But, really. What does he expect after dropping a bomb like that. I've seen him in jeans. I think back. Have I seen him in his underwear before? I'm not sure, but I've never seen anything that would lead me to believe he has such a massive dick that it scares his girlfriend.

"Both," Jason says. "Look, I guess it was kinda stupid to bring up. Can we forget …"

"Are you shitting me?" I say. "You can't just tell your bro you have a big D and not prove it. Come on. Show me how big you're talking."

"Percy," he says, his tone of voice reminiscent of the way my mom or my teachers say my name when they think I'm being annoying. I don't even care.

"What's the matter, Grace? You scared? Afraid I'll scream and run away from your big bad johnson?"

"Dude," Jason whispers. "I'd have to get hard to show you and in case you haven't noticed, we're two straight guys with girlfriends. We don't get each other hard and look at each others' dicks."

I'm not sure why I don't drop it. It's probably because it's been so long since I've been riled up about anything. High school life is a real snore, especially when the monsters have mostly stopped cropping up. I never thought I'd miss that.

"We're bros, Jason. I don't see why it's such a big deal. It's not like we don't know we each have a dick and like to jerk off. It's not like we're cheating on our girlfriends if we just compare sizes or something."

"So you'd do it too?" Jason asks. I'm winning, he sounds likes he's coming around. I want to pump my fist in triumph, but that would probably look really weird and more than a little bit gay, even if it totally isn't. I hold my victory dance inside.

"Sure. I'm not all that small myself, you know."

I grab my cock and start stroking, and gods, it feels good to just do it. I don't even know why I was pretending I'd be able to fall asleep without jerking off. With things going like they have been, I've become a jerk off champion. It's hard to let memories of Tartarus creep in at night if I fall asleep after an awesome fantasy and a killer orgasm.

I'm really getting into it when I remember Jason is in bed too, doing the same thing, and I start slowing down.

The sounds Jason makes send my heart racing, and not in a bad way. I strain my ears, trying to hear more, but it seems like he's well trained in doing it as quietly as possible.

"You ready to show me?" I ask, and my face grows hot all over again because that just came out sounding a lot like a pick up line, and that's totally not how I meant it.

He chuckles under his breath, and throws the blanket down to our feet. It's dark in the room, but my eyes have mostly adjusted and I look down to see what kind of big Jason is talking about. My breath catches in my throat at the sight. He wasn't lying.

I swallow hard and scoot closer beside him. "Whoa. How big would you say that is? Like in inches?"

"Uh, I've measured it before. It's almost eleven."

My mouth fills with saliva; I have no idea why, and I sit up, taking a closer look. "How big around?" He strokes it with his left hand, but seems to be supporting the base with his right. I'm not sure if his fingers even meet around the girth.

"Not sure," he grunts, then moves his hands away, letting the magnificent beast slap against his abs. "But I'd better stop doing that or I'll have a mess to clean up."

I sit on my knees, trying to figure out how big my dick is in comparison. He's got me beat by a long shot, I'm certain of that, but by how much? I need an answer. "Dude, can you really just work yourself up and then not come? Why the self-punishment?"

"We're just comparing, right? You wanted to see how big it is, so there's your answer. I didn't think coming was on the table."

I raise my eyebrow. "You saying you don't want to come?"

The charge in the air is back again; I can smell it, almost taste it. My dick throbs, need pooling in my gut.

"Fuck it," Jason says. He grabs his dick and starts stroking, and I can't tear my eyes away. I can see him clear enough in the darkness. The moon shining around the edges of the curtains bathes the room in a dim blue light.

I'm not gay, but there's no way I can deny that Jason's sexy. The way he strokes his huge cock, rocking his hips in a practiced rhythm, his free hand playing with one of his nipples, I have to squeeze my dick at the base to keep myself from coming at the sight, and then, the asshole calls me on it.

"Jackson, you gonna get with the program, or you just gonna watch me get myself off?"

I blink my eyes, realizing how I must look to Jason. I laugh it off and lie down beside him, but it's a mistake. Now his smell, his lust, is clinging to me, wrapping me up in it and I can't help but fall victim to its pull. I roll on my side, scooting closer to him, inhaling the intoxicating scent. I can't stop myself.

His breathing stutters and he rolls on his side too, bringing our bodies flush against each other. The second our dicks touch, I'm gone. I'm totally gay for Jason, but I don't say anything. I don't want to scare him off, and I don't want him to move away.

He doesn't. He shifts his hips and presses our cocks harder against each other, breaths coming short and ragged. "Fuck. This is so fucked," he groans, but instead of springing apart, he starts a new grinding rhythm with his hips, and I fall into it as if it's the most natural thing in the world.

Gods, I can't even describe the feeling of having another cock up against mine. Hard and soft at the same time, and the heat building between our chests – I have to touch him. I stare at his face, his eyes shut tight as if he'll be able to deny what's happening if he can't see it.

I hover my hand over our cocks, watching for a reaction in his face, and finally just go for it. I wrap my hand around his cock, mine still rutting up against it, and his eyes fly open. He doesn't tell me to stop and I don't. I'm fascinated. It feels so similar to mine in some ways, but so much bigger; I just want to explore it all over.

My heart jumps into my throat, but I'm going for broke. I have a history of saying things without thinking them through, and if this really goes downhill, I can probably blame it on my ADHD, but if I don't go for it, I might lose the chance.

"Jason," I murmur. My voice comes out low and rumbly; it surprises me, but seems to be just the right tone to reach him in his aroused state. "I want to suck you off."

Amazingly, he doesn't push me away. Instead, he closes his eyes, smiling briefly, and then opens them again, but this time they're like wolf eyes. He moves faster than I can follow, and flips us so I'm on top of him, my face at his groin, and his between my legs, my knees on either side of his head.

"Suck it, Jackson," he commands.

I do not even know how or why, but the way he says the words … I open my mouth like a good boy and start sucking. It's amazing and huge, and I'm drowning in the taste on my tongue, the ache in my jaw, and then he starts sucking me at the same time, and it's all I can do to hold in my cries of pleasure. Luckily, they're pretty much stoppered by Jason's dick.

It's easy to get lost in what I'm doing, just carried away by the moment. My goal is to get Jason off before I come - and get him to make noise - seriously, this quiet act is not him.


I take his cock in as far as I can, and I'm still nowhere near swallowing the whole thing. I know it's absurd to think I could. My mouth and throat are not big enough, but it doesn't stop me from trying. I've never thought dicks came in this size in real life - not that I've really spent much time thinking about it. It doesn't matter. The point is beating Jason. I lift up and bob my head a few times, and finally, he makes noise, sends a fucking shockwave up my dick to my spine, and I have to pull off to catch my breath and try not to come.

I lick his dick all over. It's crazy, like I can't get enough of it, then I use my saliva to jerk him, tickling the base of his cockhead with my tongue. He grips my hips, fingers pressing in hard enough to bruise, and I'm so fucked up; I hope they leave marks.

He pulls off my dick, panting, and that only serves to spur me on, even though my hand is starting to cramp, and my jaw aches like a bitch. A dribble of precome slides from his tip and I lick it off. It's bitter, salty, and I can't get enough of it. How did I ever convince myself I didn't want this? How can I ever not have it again? And I realize, if this is really my one shot at Jason - I don't want to think about how we're probably not going to be able to look each other in the eye again when it's over - I want it all.

My brain to mouth filter, never very good to begin with, seems to have gotten lost somewhere because I'm sharing my thoughts without really thinking them through. "I can take it, man."

Jason pushes me off himself, but he's not pushing me away, not really. I go where he guides me, and then he pulls me back on top of him, face to face, chests pressed together. He shifts his hand under me and then pulls it free, and I'm about ready to die from ecstasy. His long, thick cock rubs up the cleft of my ass, and I'm burning up all over at the idea of taking it.

I have never told a living soul, especially not Annabeth, but when I say I'm the jerk off champion, I really go all out. As soon as I heard about the prostate gland, I went exploring the second I had time to myself. I'm no stranger to having toys up my ass, but I've never taken anything like Jason's cock before. Right now, it's all I want.

"What?" he whispers, rocking our hips together, the slow drag pulling me under. "What can you take, Percy?"

I meet his eyes. It's the first time we've looked at each other, acknowledged what we're doing, and my face is pure heat. But he's still got that alpha wolf thing going on with his voice. I don't know how else to describe it, basically, he's got me by the scruff of the neck and whatever he says right now, I'll do.

"Your cock. I can take it."

He growls low in his throat; it's music to my soul. I don't even know why or how I'm suddenly turning into a mushy puddle of sap, but I want it so much, I don't stop and question it.

"I'll hurt you," he murmurs. I'm tempted to kiss him, just to get him to shut up, but that would probably break the spell we're under. I'm not chancing it.

I shake my head. "I really can. Just go slow, maybe stretch me first."

His eyes grow wide in his face, and I bite my lip when I feel the head of his cock rubbing my asshole. "Okay," he says.

The next thing I know, he sits up and pushes me back, arranges my body as if I'm a puppet and he's controlling the strings. I'm face down on the bed, my hips in the air, knees spread, and when I move my head so I can look down, my cock and balls hang freely, primed and ready. It's so fucking hot; I turn my head and close my eyes. I'll come just looking at myself, and then I'll lose. Jason's gonna take me, and he's going to come first, I swear it.

"Oh!" I can't help exclaim. Holy Hera! I moan into the sheets, hotter than I think I've ever been. Jason's licking my ass like the guys in the porn we watched, and I get it now. I grip the sheets with my fists, holding on for dear life. It's too fucking good, and just so wrong. The idea that Jason, Mister lead-by-example, would throw all the rules away to make sure he doesn't hurt me … I'm so fucked. And even as I'm thinking it, my body cries out that it doesn't care; I'll do anything to get more, to keep going.

Jason is probably the greatest lover in the world. I'm almost jealous of him – why can't I be this attentive? If I focused on Annabeth anywhere close to the way he's focusing on me – I push the thought away. It's bad enough I'm cheating, fuck; I'm cheating! Jason pushes his fingers inside me, curling them just right and I moan again, pushing my hips back and trying to take as much of him in as I can. I can't think about reality right now. I'm doomed. I will deal with it later.

"Grace," I groan, "do it! I want it."

He pulls back. I hear him breathing hard. His hands on my hips tremble, like he's struggling to hold himself together. That makes two of us. At least we're on even ground there.

He seems to pull himself together again, and I feel like I'm back under his control again. I vaguely wonder if he doesn't have some latent ability to control other demigods, but then, I'm so far under his thrall, I don't even care.

"C'mon," he says, and smacks my ass. My knees go weak. I'm so whipped it's not even funny. "I want to do this right."

He pulls me up to face him, and I can't keep my hands to myself. I touch his chest, run my palms over his pecs, pinch his nipples, all the while looking into his eyes. I dunno, I'm nervous or something; gotta keep my hands busy. I don't know what he means by 'do this right'. There's nothing right about what we're doing, but I go with it. He guides me until I'm lying on my back, and then pushes my legs up and open, spreading me like a frog (I cringe at my own brain for even thinking that). I focus instead on the sensations. I'm not the best person for putting my feelings into words, which is probably what got me into this state in the first place. I tell my brain to shut up and just go with the flow.

Jason slots himself right up against my ass, and then leans over me, his hands on my shoulders. I'm melting under his gaze, totally fluid, and just giving it all up. His lips meet mine and yeah, I'm gone again. There is no excuse for what we're doing, no way I can call this a thing bros do. I open my mouth and give him everything. It's a huge feeling of relief, not being in charge. I don't even know what I'm thinking, but opening up and just allowing the pleasure to come, it's what I'm made for. My cheeks burn all over again, even as I chase Jason's tongue, not ready to let it go.

He chuckles into the kiss, then licks the roof of my mouth, and damn, I didn't even know about that hot spot. My dick hasn't been touched since we started, but it's hard, throbbing, leaking against my abs. Jason runs his cock up and down my cleft, sending my nerves flying in their own mini-typhoon, and then he works his hand between our bodies, lining us up. He distracts me with another mind-blowing kiss - I swear the guy is trying to coax my soul out through my mouth - and pushes forward. My body opens for him, and I feel his arms tense under my hands, like he's surprised it's working.

I hold onto his biceps, breathing through the stretch, the thrill of being filled, and then he's in all the way, panting into my mouth.

"Fuck, fuck," he huffs, stilling, breathing hard.

I shift my hips as he lifts his head, eyes closed and utter bliss plastered across his face. It's all good, and I'm ready for him to start moving or something. I smack his ass, and he opens his eyes. They're unfocused, almost drunk-looking.

"I'm not hurting you?" His voice sounds so small, so worried.

"Dude, I'm going to hurt you if you don't start fucking."

He grins crookedly, and I roll my eyes, but then he starts thrusting and I can't even keep a single thought in my head. My language is reduced to grunts, and even more embarrassing mewls, and a single word: "Yeah, yeah, yeah."

I'd smack myself in the face if I wasn't dissolved in pleasure. He's so big and yet he's just pushing up inside me. I can practically feel his cock in my own cock, which makes absolutely no sense, but it doesn't matter right now. I just need more, more, more.

Jason gives it to me. He pushes himself back so he's sitting upright, holds onto my hips, and pounds me into oblivion. It's all I can do to stay in my body. I seriously feel like he's gonna dislodge my animus, or whatever the hell it's called. I grip the sheets, my head jerking like I'm on a rollercoaster, and then he slows down again.

I look down to where he's staring at his cock, watching it disappear into my body, and I feel every inch. My cock slides on my stomach in a pool of precome I didn't even realize I'd leaked, and then he looks up and meets my eyes. He moves his hand to my chest, still doing the slow thrusting thing, and his palms are hot, learning my body like a topographical map. I push my mind away again; it keeps thinking stupid things. Instead, I reach down to feel Jason's chest when he pushes in all the way.

"Come on," I murmur. I need him to come soon before my balls explode. I'm not touching myself on purpose; he'd better keep his hands off, too, or I'll lose it.

He shifts again, hitting me just right and a jet of come shoots up my chest, but I'm not even there yet; I'm still rock hard. Jason stares at the mess, then starts playing with it with his fingers, and I push back against him, needing him to keep going. He brings his fingers up to his mouth and sucks them clean. I think my brain is going to explode.

"Fuck me like you mean it, Grace," I practically growl. I'm so turned on I feel like I'm about ready to crawl out of my skin.

He lowers himself, resting on his forearms on either side of my shoulders, pressing our chests together and keeping his thrusts shallow. "I'm afraid of finishing, Percy," he whispers. "It's going to be bad afterwards."

Damn it! I don't want reality getting in the way yet.

"It'll be fine," I lie. What the hell am I supposed to say? "Let's have it while we can. Good as we can, while it lasts."

He smashes our mouths together again, and I'm swept up by his possessive tongue, savoring the deep stabs of his cock, memorizing the sensations.

I hold onto his his flexing ass, squeezing his cheeks as he pushes me into the mattress with his full weight, hugging my body with his elbows and forearms, hands on my shoulders, finally speeding up again.

I kiss him, fully connecting with him. Joke's on both of us, it seems. Even though we've both been with our chosen other halves, we're each others' firsts, really, and this, I suspect – though I don't say it – will probably be the experience we measure everything against in the future. I doubt I'll ever find another match.

My face is hot again, but this time it's not just pleasure; it's pain, emotional pain. I'm getting teary-eyed, but then, Jason hits me just right. "Oh!" I cry into his mouth.

He pulls back, meeting my eyes, hips moving faster, his breaths growing short, and I think we climax at the same time. All I know is my back arches, I'm pushing up against his abs, and he's burying himself inside me, hips stuttering, pressing my ass into the mattress, and breathing heavy and warm against my face.

We stay like that for a long time. I'm not sure if it's only minutes or hours; time feels irrelevant. But eventually our cocks soften and Jason pulls out, then flops onto the bed beside me. We stare at the ceiling, not talking, as if drawing it out will make facing the truth less painful.

My heart rate slows, my breathing evening out, and I realize I have to say something. There has to be a way to salvage our friendship. I'm not willing to lose it because of – whatever this was – a shared hallucination, a mass hysteria, a reality check?

"Well," I say, then pause. "That was …"

"Pretty damn gay," Jason finishes, and my lips start twitching.

I laugh, and look over at him grinning back at me. I nod, still laughing. "Yeah, it was."

We stare at each other until our laughter dies and our smiles fade. "I probably … well, we should both probably … clean up, or something." I cringe. Why do I suck at this so bad? It's just Jason. I can be myself in front of him. "Dude, let's agree to something right now."

He raises an eyebrow. Yeah, he knows I'm full of trash as much as I do, but I don't let it bother me.

"Let's not let this make things weird. We'll get up, clean up, put on our clothes, and talk like usual, okay? I trust you with my life, bro, and I hope you trust me too. We can figure this all out and make it okay, okay?"

He smirks at me, but nods. "Right on," he says, holding out his fist.

I bump it, and we get cleaned up.

We sit on the bed again. Thankfully, there was a change of sheets in the dresser under the television set.

The lights are off, and Jason reaches over and holds my hand, giving it a squeeze.

"So," he says, "that just happened."

I nod. I'm not gonna deny it, but I'm also not sure what I'm supposed to say next. We just had mind-blowing sex. I'm beat, and my body makes its need for sleep clear by yawning.

"The question is," he continues, ignoring my sleepiness, "what are we going to do about it?"

I look at him, my head cocked to the side. Is he suggesting there are options? I don't see any options, but then, I've basically been pushing all thoughts about what happens next down and pretending they don't exist.

"What are our options?" I ask. I think I sound serious when I ask the question, but I'm never sure if people are going to take me seriously, so I never know if I sound like an idiot or not.

Jason hums, brushing his thumb over the back of my hand. "One, we try to go back to the way it was before. Swear it won't ever happen again and say nothing to our girlfriends."

I nod. That sounds like the best option to me, but when I look at him again, I can tell it's probably not going to work. All he has to do is say, roll over and let me fuck you, Percy, and I'd do it. I roll my eyes at myself. "Okay. What's two?"

"Two, we fess up. We return to Camp, and I go and tell Piper what happened and you do the same with Annabeth, then we let them make the call whether they want to break up with us or try to work things out."

I grimace. That sounds painful. It's probably the best option, though. In quests, it's usually the most treacherous path that ends up being the right choice.

"Mhm," I say. "Is there a three?"

He breathes out a long sigh. "There's a three and a four. Three, we decide what we want to do, right here, right now. If we want to like, end things with our girlfriends and embrace the gay life with each other, or whatever …"

He sounds like he's trying to make that option the least appealing, and I'm not sure why. It feels like he's trying to protect himself, like he thinks I'll make fun of him if he says it any way other than sarcastically.

"… And four, umm ... I'm not sure what four is. What do you think four is?"

"Dude," I say, still mulling over option three. He shifts uncomfortably, but doesn't let go of my hand. I look him in the eye. "Do you have feelings for me? Like gay love feelings? Like honestly, and I'm not gonna make fun of you?"

He pulls his hand free, and my hand feels cold, but it seems like he just needed to rake his hair out of his eyes. He puts it back on mine without even thinking about it.

"I'm not sure. I love you, man. But I always thought it was bro love, you know? What about you?"

I wrinkle my forehead. Why do feelings have to be so fucking hard? I think back over the really, really amazing sex we just had. I can still feel where he was inside me. Can I go without having Jason ever again? But then, Annabeth. I can't do this to her. I can't tell her; I can't break up with her and take up with Jason, that would crush her. I'm stuck. Do I love her? My instant answer is yes. I love her, and her happiness is more important to me than anything else, but then … I breathe out slowly. The one time we had sex was more like she was humoring me than wanting it. I accused her of thinking about school while we were doing it and she didn't deny it; she came back at me like it was my fault it sucked. I frown. Is it possible that we're just not sexually compatible, or was it just a first bad time and will get better if we keep working at it? When I used to picture my future, Annabeth was always front and center, but now, I'm seeing a crossroads. It's like Janus is talking to me from both his faces, trying to get me to focus on one over the other, and I can't get over how weird his ears look.

I shake my head. I'm so tired, I'm dreaming awake.

Jason's thumb on the back of my hand draws my focus again. It feels good, real, comfortable. I look at him. "I feel something. And it's a strong feeling … but I just don't know." It's the only honest answer I have.

He nods. "We're in the same boat, then." He yawns.

"Hephaestus once told me that daybreak is a good time to make decisions," I say, half-musing to myself.

Jason yawns again. "That's good advice. C'mon. Let's sleep and see what the new day brings."

We crawl under the sheets and automatically shift so Jason spoons up behind me. I feel warm and really comfortable. It isn't long before sleep pulls me under, but the last thing I think before succumbing to it is how am I ever going to know if I made the right choice?
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